file under: "only in the pioneer valley":

Yay for small town police reports. this one comes from the Amherst Bulletin (via a friend on facebook):

1:18 a.m. - A woman attending a reunion party at a downtown restaurant told police a former classmate gave her a bear hug that may have injured her ribs. Police advised her she could file a complaint in court.

dude. what a whiner. like i always say: it's not a proper 'bear hug' unless you bruise at least one rib...