You guys: I'm back!!!

Update: I actually finished my degree (can't believe it myself!) and I moved from Baltimore to Ann Arbor, MI. It is a whole new world out here. I've traded hipsters for preppies. I've traded giant rats and roaches for overly aggressive squirrels and geese. Views of razor wire and tall buildings for trees and a pond. It's been quite an adjustment. Is it weird that I sort of miss hearing dance music playing next door? 

Being back in an office has been an especially big adjustment after working from home for years. I miss my comfy daytime pajamas terribly. Professional, adult clothing is the worst. It's just so... restrictive. I have 5 passable outfits (just enough to make it through a work week). I try to wear them in a different order each week, because I somehow think that that will make it less obvious that I only have 5 outfits. Wearing makeup every day SUCKS too. I just want to wash my face all day long. I miss working out whenever I feel like it. I miss taking a break to make a delicious sandwich for lunch and then eating it while working, because it's the prep time that I find relaxing, not the eating time. I also - full confession here - really miss being able to burp out loud (seriously). 

It's a world I'd mostly forgotten existed. A world where my pants look nice but feel uncomfortable. A world where I can't burp freely when drinking seltzer water. A world where I overhear extremely personal phone conversations because cubicles afford zero privacy. 

To elaborate on that last point: the woman in the cubicle adjacent to mine is lovely - really just so kind and friendly - but I don't think she realizes that I can hear every single thing she says. I don't try to listen, it's just impossible not to: her whisper is more stage whisper than subtle whisper. It's so distracting that I end up listening whether I mean to or not. So now I know all about how her deadbeat ex-husband is sleeping on her couch because he lost his job, and even though none of her friends approve, she thinks it's ok because he promised it would only be for a little while. I even know all about her upcoming colonoscopy, which she once accidentally (but hilariously) referred to as a "colostomy" (really not the same thing!). The worst part though? Her constant diet talk! Every day she asks someone how their diet is going, and then talks about her own diet. Different people, sometimes in person, sometimes on the phone. Painful diet talk all day long. And, let's be honest, diet talk is fucking awkward.

Like this in-person exchange I witnessed the other day:
Office lady's work friend: "How many Weight Watchers points is that?" (points to Starbucks Venti cup)
Office lady: "I'm not sure. I just really wanted one. I guess I should look it up." (Pauses, presumably to look it up on her phone) "Uh oh. This says it's 19* points for this drink with whole milk. But I got skim... what do you think that is?"
Office lady's friend: "I don't know. 17?"
Office lady: "Oh… so basically I can't eat anything else for the rest of the day."
(Followed, predictably, by office lady telling everyone how hungry she is for the rest of the day.)

* I actually don't remember the exact number, nor do I have any understanding of the WW point scale, so this may be totally wrong. But there was panic in her voice... whatever number it was.

Anyway, the point is: it has been a bit of an adjustment getting used to a new city and a new job and being in an office again. But for now, I'm just thrilled to have a desk of my own, and a supply of free coffee, water and power. It's the little things in life that matter. And once I find a) sound blocking headphones and b) trousers that are as comfy as daytime pajamas, I think I'll actually be able to make this work…